Culver City, LA.
Seeing that turkeys were inexpensive, I decided to cook one for myself, mainly to see how it worked. Ran out to the local Culver City Albertson’s. Found the turkeys — whatever the special was, it turned out it was two for one. I guess some people cook two smaller turkeys? Picked up a few other things; I tend to be an impulse food shopper. The lines in the middle of the day were slow, but not bad.
A few days later, back to Albertson’s for pie supplies. My first impression: the carts in the parking lot hadn’t been collected in the week since I’d been there. Carts were blocking about a third of the parking spaces. I moved a couple, corralled about four back to the holding area.
They didn’t have any canned pumpkin. Four days before Thanksgiving. The stock person told me they’d have some next week. Hrmph. So I knew I had to stop at another market anyway. Got in line. And waited. And waited. The woman near the front had two full baskets. The woman ahead of her had apparently forgotten how to write a check, or something.
Wandered over to the self-checkout. Two of the four lanes were down for repairs. Finally stepped up.
I keep all my supermarket club card numbers on the back of a business card — I believe they’re all anonymous. But in the self-checkout, this means I have to have the attendant enter my number. “Please place item in the checkout area.” I notice there’s nowhere to put incoming groceries except the cart, but that leaves no place for finished bags. “Please place item in the checkout area.” A handmade sign suggests only using self-check for 20 items or less. “The item placed in the checkout area is incorrect. Please remove.” It was a can of condensed milk. I’d just scanned it and put it into the bag properly. A package of fresh thyme (good barcode) — “Item not recognized. Please see attendant.” Filled one bag, moved it to the floor. “Item removed from checkout area.” Well, yeah, the bag was full. There’s no “remove bag” button on the touchscreen. I was nearly ready to just give up and walk away.
Out of the store feeling dazed and stupid. I dropped my bags at the car, then wandered around the parking lot and corralled about two dozen carts into the holding pen (I probably got about a quarter of the lot). The Vons on Pico and Fairfax is pretty grubby, but it had pumpkin and pleasant human checkers.
The turkey came out great. I stuffed it not with stuffing but with orange peels, onions, thyme, and rosemary, and slathered it with Crisco to keep the skin from burning. 325° for about four hours till the thermometer said 180°. Made stuffing separately, using sausage, onion, celery, and chicken broth — came out a little dry. Prepped the gravy stock by simmering the neck and giblets (muttering to myself, “giblets… giblets…”) in more onion and celery and black pepper and salt for a couple of hours.
I’d grade myself a solid B on the turkey. C- on the stuffing. Solid A on the gravy because it was damned tasty and I got all the lumps out of it. (Reconsidered: once I got it reheated and slathered with gravy, the stuffing is damned good. B+.)
My cooking secret, which I will now reveal: I clean dishes and re-use them as I go along.